I RAN

 

stress-1837384_960_720

I  RAN

Fit as an athlete of body and mind,
I ran,
faster and harder every day.
To reach and achieve, what? I ask today;

Stopping for quick breaks to see and breathe,
heather, the Sea, meadows and snow,
Only to return to the run.

It was fun at times but what about the soul,
no time for it to fully live, to sing;
No time for the body to know the breeze.

I knew but pressed the knowledge down,
Thought I had to run.
Until one day a shot hit my neck;
in and instant I crumpled to the ground.

the structure crashed down,
Now, the ambulance ran.

Against all odds I survived,
It took time, I learned new truths,
or were they the old?
finally getting space and time,

As I no longer ran.

A picnic by the shore, sensuous and slow,
I saw, really saw,
the sky, the sea and shifting sands;
The colour displays took my breath away.
Time didn’t have a meaning, just Now was life.

Walking instead of running, seeing wonder in all,
Like a newborn child,
I promised never to lose that again
even if I learnt to run.

I lost a lot that day but now wonder,
Did I not gain even more?
The time to write a poem in the morn;
Or listen to a frightened man,

To feel the blessing and joy of giving comfort,
of connecting with those needing support;
To find the positives born from pain.

© miriam ivarson

Screen Shot 2018-09-28 at 12.41.08

dsc01090.jpg

 

45 thoughts on “I RAN

  1. An important take, Miriam, on our heedless rush through life. All the time we do that, we are missing so much of what lies around us just needing some time, a pause for consideration, for contemplation, before the hectic pace of our lives is picked up once again. This image holds throughout your wholly convincing poem.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Thank you Roland for your thoughtful and appreciative comment.
      I feel that you have been there yourself as have so many in our Westerrn world. We get caught up in these rapids and just keep the head above water.

      I now know what a the berries and nuts in my breakfast cereal taste like, how delicious the coffe is, the wonder of the sunlight on the trees across the garden and smile at the scampering squirrels …….oh, so busy. 😊 .

      Miriam

      Liked by 4 people

  2. Darlene, a heartfelt thank you for your beautiful comment.
    Before pressing the button this morning I did wonder whether I had packed to much in one poem. I took the chance that you would understand that there were richness in the hectic life as well.

    Nothing is black or white.

    Miriam

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Well said, Miriam. There is a lot to be gained by slowing down and smelling the roses. On the other hand, the rhythmic footfall and breathing during a run can calm the mind, being almost hypnotic. There is space for “fast” and “slow” in this life. Think of “instant” versus “slow-brewed” coffee. Both good in their own way.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thank you for commenting. I have perhaps been too metaphorical in my poem
      as ” I. Ran ” refers to the speed in which I lived my life. Too much stress.
      Physical movement is of course an antidote to this.

      miriam

      Like

  4. This poem stunned me, shocked that you’d been shot and assuming it was a bullet, until I read the disclaimer at the end. But a subarachnoid hemorraghe is no small wound. As I understand, it’s bleeding from a brain aneurysm. Most people die from them – an uncle and a close friend did not survive their bleeds, and both died relatively young. What you’ve endured, Miriam, is a catastrophic experience, and though I’m relieved to see how it impressed you to appreciate things seen at a slow stroll, I certainly wish this had never happened to you.

    It does force you to slow down, to be gentle with yourself. Thank you for a poem infused with insight and the wonder of the world. I hope your health is much improved.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Dear Sharon, thank you for this response so filled with deep empathy.
      You are right about the fatality rate, it is high and I am sad you lost two so near you this way. The suddenness is hard for those who see this.

      In a sudden rupture of the aneurism it sounds like a shot. Truly.
      Nobody meeting me today would know I had a problem. First came the recovery of memory and speech, and balance. The crippling headaches seemed the worse.
      I returned to work but changed many routines and learnt to say a calm no when needed.
      So I am a lucky one and aware of it every day. That is part of seeing all that surrounds you. I think. Never taking for granted.

      Once again, your loving answer touches deep.

      Miriam

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you Rosaliene for your lovely comment.
    I am glad you found the basis of strength in your life and have time to really live. After all, that is in many ways the credentials for being a writer. 😊❤️ .
    Blessing to you too.

    Miriam

    Liked by 2 people

  6. When I was reading this poem Miriam, I thought all the running is metaphorical till I came upon your answer to one of the comments that you are talking about a real rupture. I am sorry that you had to undergo all that pain and learnt the value of leading a relaxed life. We all run to accomplish our dreams, aspirations along with added responsibilities till something drastic slows us down! I am glad you have changed with routine… I agree with you…having learnt a lot to look around, to write a poem and stay calm. Life is an awesome teacher!

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thank you Balroop for your heartfelt comment. It is so true that life itself
      is an awesome teacher. So many of us need to find the balance and avoid the dangerous stress levels. I always loved nature and the arts but the true
      time to enjoy them came in bits. Just now a little white feather floated down outside and I followed it with delight. Will soon go out and pick it up and take a photo.
      After a lazy and dreamy breakfast.😊.
      Be well Balroop

      Miriam

      Liked by 2 people

  7. Miriam,
    The things we remember in life are not the lavish gifts received, no, they are the simple things and most have something of nature in them for that is where we dream and remember to kiss the sky.
    Indeed we all gained more on that day….jc

    Liked by 4 people

  8. Thank you Jc for your endearing comment. I so agree about the things of lasting value in life. Gifts are wonderful when given with thought and care for the recipient and money needed for a nice abode. However, the free things around us, the sky, the ocean, the forest, lakes and rivers…..they all fill our heart. As do people in our lives .
    Your last sentence brought tears to my eyes.

    miriam

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Thank you so much Jaqui, your comment is very inspiring.
    Yes, a positive attitude is important to feel the quality life has to give and
    equally give quality to what you have to give.

    Many ‘gives’ here.😊

    Miriam

    Liked by 2 people

  10. This wonderful poem is so much about life we all know, the stress of work, running or whatever it might be…we don’t stop to live. I wish I had learned that lesson earlier in life, but better late than never 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Tiny, thank you for your beautiful and wise comment. I guess we feel
    invincible for many years and then get ourselves into routines that we
    really didn’t choose consciously. It all escalates.

    But I understand from your words that you also learnt in time for change.
    That is a blessing. 😊

    miriam

    Like

  12. That was a much needed reminder for many of us Miriam. Pain teaches us to slow down pace, pause, reflect and embrace beautiful things to energise the soul with positive vibrations. Life is the best teacher, for what it teaches, no school can do so. Stay blessed and have a wonderful week ahead 💖

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for your lovely comment Radhika. I am so very glad if this poem
      would make anyone consider in time, before life teaches you the hard way.
      It is not always the work as such that damages but the increasing stresses of too many roles coupled with problems to solve and impossible logistics.

      I have seen many others collapse under the burden albeit not often as dramatic as I did.
      You have a wonderful week ahead too, the sun is shining here in the North.❤️.

      miriam

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Well done, Miriam! And what a blessing that you survived and were able to recover. This is a good reminder to slow down and take time to experience the joys around us, because we never know when that “shot” will happen. It might never happen, but at least we enjoyed the journey.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Thank you Julie for your kind and thoughtful comment. It is indeed a dramatic way of making you stop and eventually think. None of us have any guarantees for the day but that doesn’t mean we should live in fear.
    Hopefully it will help to treasure life even more.

    Miriam

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Thank you for your wonderful comment Miriam. It makes me glad that you
    could feel both sides strongly through the verses. I know you are learning to live life in the ‘slower lane’ too.

    miriam

    Like

  16. Thanks for trying Jim. Grrrrr … indeed. I have had a few who haven’t got my posts. Wish WP would tell why I am out of favour. 😊 .
    This happened to me so I ticked delivery by email.

    How do we tell them that we are not too happy 😊 😙

    miriam

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Miriam, a superlative poem which is not just a personal account but an indictment upon all our lives in a society where fastest is presumed the best. You ask ‘Did I not gain even more?’ and I feel, very luckily for you, the answer is a resounding yes! Your wisdom, spirituality shines out in all your work, slowing down, albeit enforced, allowed you a time to see, feel, capture the magic of the world around you. Happily you have chosen to share your work with us here on WP! Wishing you safe and good health, don’t run anymore, saunter and admire the world at your leisure! Continue to ‘To find the positives born from pain.’ ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    • Annika, thank you for this beautiful response, can you hear my heart singing?
      I came to finally share this personal event after meeting an assistant in a carpet shop. I saw a deep fear in his eyes and it seemed to trigger his story.
      To share and feel the strength of survival helped him so much that he got tear eyed and came to hug me and said ‘ you don’t know how much this meant. I will stop being afraid and just go living.’

      So there was a great positive for me and maybe someone else can draw
      courage from that.

      miriam

      Liked by 1 person

  18. On this occasion, I cannot say much Miriam, for reasons you’re aware of, but I can say thank you for sharing in such a beautiful way, and your kindness & understanding of my own situation since we became good friends. x

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for your beautiful words Nigel, and yes I understand your reticence as to events that are life changing. Your positive and caring outlook
      is one I admire and feel in tune with.
      To have become friends means a lot and a thing to cherish.x

      miriam

      Liked by 1 person

  19. Wow, Miriam, what a reflective and beautiful poem containing so much wisdom of how we all should live our lives. When I read about the shot, I first thought of a bullet, no doubt because of the many and frequent shootings in our country, and it was shocking. Then I realized it was a metaphor for your medical experience, which is scary enough. I can’t even imagine, but I’m so grateful you came through and have changed your ways so that life isn’t one big race anymore. I’m sure we all get sucked into the race at some time in our lives, and sometimes, it does take something drastic to open our eyes. Again, I’m glad you’re better, and it’s wonderful that this beautiful poem emerged from such a frightening experience. Hugs ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Lauren for this wonderful and caring comment. I am really glad you liked the poem. I am afraid I almost didn’t put the explanation to ,the shot, in as it really didn’t read as a metaphor to me.
      It really felt and sounded like a gunshot – only there are no shotguns around any houses I know of.
      A dear friend thought it best with a note at the end. 😊. She was right.

      You are right, it is good when light comes out of dark. This happened years ago and I don’t often think about it but still take time to be grateful to life each day, even when it can seem a tough day.
      Hugs 💕

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Oh my gosh. I had no idea you went through this “brain shot.” Scary scary. Yet you learned so much through it. I was a runner also. For years. It helped me feel released from responsibility and cares during those 5-7 miles I ran three or five times a week. But then, my knees became ‘shot,’ and I turned to walking. Much more meditative and calming and allowing time to listen to the sound of the birds…and myself, and the Spirit. Your poem is spectacular.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Thank you for your very generous compliment to my poem.
    So you were a runner – physically. That is the big thing in today’s word. I tended to use Gyms regularly and walk or swim on week-ends.

    I know you understood that the running in my poem referred to how I led my life. Coping with multiple roles. In short, a stress that suddenly felled me.
    I was told that this was the factor of my near fatality. Makes one realise how
    we often ignore life itself for untenable goals.

    Keep walking instead Pam, you see so much more and it enriches the whole of you. 💕

    miriam

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s